Saturday, July 16, 2011

Lovelife/Sexlife... Counting the Men in my Life

After acquiring my birthmark in gayhood (I refer to the healed laceration in my anus when I lost my virginity), I ventured into many sexual activities. I initially conditioned myself to rather do cocksucking methods in all of my tricks, than being butt-fucked after the painful anal experience. But a friend told me such pain is normal and felt only during the first encounter, as if a vagina that comes loose after the hymen broke. So I thought of giving it another shot when I attended one public dance in barangay Amontay, another barangay in my hometown at its far west on the way to another town called Malimono; so far from home. Again I felt so beautiful to be crowded by two teenage boys, one manuevering my behind while the other romancing my topless body. When one penis entered my hole, the pain stunned me. I pushed the boy away... Since then, I gave up on being bottom. I can not enjoy this kind of fun(-ck), I concluded. So that evening ended at jerking the two boys off, because I declined at sucking too.

Most Filipino boys, generally straight, took gays for self-gratification. They pursue same sex activity for curiosity sake, which I found very favorable. I took the advantage of luring them (most particularly the hearthrobs) to have me suck their "notes" instead of masturbating by themselves. (We Filipino gays call man's dicks as notes basically because sucking it resembles singing, which involves musical notes, holding a microphone.) This has put me in the A-list of gay-suckers for curious and attractive teenage boys. This was where I got all my tricks. And of course, it all come free of charge.

One unforgettable and very successful luring I did was with the tweens in my home barrio. Barangay Poblacion was the towncenter of Anao-aon where most of the goodlooking teenage boys reside. I tasted the likes of  Toto Maniwang, Dennis Besario, Dennis Gaugano, Jan-jan Clerigo, Romeo Vallente, Jr., Marjun Murillon, Nilmar Pasaporte, and many others. Of course, there were handsome guys from the adjacent barangays, the likes of Erwin Gordonas and Lloyd Pinat. Included in the count are some of my male cousins like Raymond Baldecir, Baloy Japzon and Custer Balboa (just locking lips though). Even my High School classmates and friends, Romie Murillon (just torrid kissing), Loloy Diaz and Cocoy Perez, which I happened to have sex with only after college. And there were a lot more that I can no longer name them. In fact, I have tallied about 195 boys in a piece of paper which I burnt during one lenten recollection way back then... t'was year 1997 I think.

Despite the joys of everyday tricks, I also fumbled into shall we say "formal" relationships with boys. Formal for me means the boy stick with me as a sex partner, like some kind of a retainer (I laugh at this metaphor), for a quite sometime from a year or two. My very first was with someone from Parang, Gigaquit - another town of Surigao del Norte province lying in the east coast towards the Philippine Deep. I was yet in college when I went there with my classmates and met this guy, sad to say that I forgot his real name. Maybe this was not a real relationship afterall, or because he was already dead; he died in Christmas of 2000 during a brawl in their neighborhood. He once membered a local band, and because I love singing I fell for him that same night. But he's a drunkard and so we have not consummated a sex, not even one. It is indeed true that once a man is heavily drunk, he can not afford a real stand. But what flattered me during those times when we seemed steady, was that he never failed to write a love letter to me, handmailed by my classmate, Kareen Dedumo, his neighbor. His name I guessed was buried with him.

One notable relationship I have had with a man was with Reynante Navarro. He was  a nephew of the then Vice Governor Navarro of Surigao province. I met him when he drove a passenger tricycle I hailed one night after a gimmick with gay friends. He's kinda petite with a dwarf-like voice; I have not spoken to a real dwarf but he sounded like those popularized by the radios and TVs as dwarf's. I was immediately attracted to him that night. I successfully flirted with him that he ended up walking me to the front door of my apartment in Navarro street, Surigao city. When I introduced myself, he declared that he already knew me. It flattered me to have such a good-looking fan. But in the long-run I realized that he indeed knew me as the hated instructor of his girlfriend; which I happened to fail in one of my Accounting 1 sections, during my stint as college instructor in Saint Paul University-Surigao, formerly San Nicolas College.

Since our meeting, he then fetched me from school almost everyday at 4pm after my last period and walked me to my apartment. I did not assume then that we were a couple until one afternoon that he himself defined what we are. Flattering! It went on for several months, the fetching from school or the night visits. Sometimes on weekend nights we drove out in his passenger tricycle. When we collected enough from conveying passengers, we will park at the portside, order bottles of beer and get drunk. It usually ended at kissing, necking and petting...

One gloomy night, Reynante knocked at my apartment and asked me for a serious talk. He's soaked with rainwater and declined my invitation to enter the apartment to dry. He instead asked me slap him... in the face. I was stunned, perplexed and petrified! It in fact woke me up that past midnight. I asked him why would I slap him on the face but initially hesitated to speak out. Noticing my uprising irritation, he declared that impregnate his girlfriend, my ex-student, the one I failed in Accounting 1. I uprightly told him to marry her because I thought it was the best thing to do. He told me he can back out if I am interested in adopting the child. What? NOOOOO! I was never a father-figure or a mother-material, if that's the correct term. So we ended that encounter with break up tears. And that day when he and his preggy girlfriend fetched me from school, invited me for a wedding, and assigned me to take care of the wedding cake, was the last time he saw me. I felt bitter, yes!, and so I went into hiding.

My longest serious relationship, although intermittent, was with Toto (Agapito Jr) Salibay. I like him more than the others because he rose from the an underprivileged family as me; both our fathers are farmers, our mothers plain housewives. He lived in a small community in Alang-alang, Ipil, a barangay of Surigao City, more or less two kilometers away from our house. We encountered during one jeepney ride --- he was with his father bringing in bamboo poles from the mountains of barangay Macopa; I was with my elder brother on our way to the city. I kept staring at him, his lips most importantly. I really was drooling at the thin, pink lips... daydreaming locking mine on them. Yes, of course he noticed me, he noticed my fantasy. It was short-lived though when few minutes later the 2-km distance was reached and they disembarked. I followed him with my sweetest smile and he smiled back. Bingo! He liked me too, so I thought.

One February 11 came, feast day of Our Lady of Lourdes, the patron saint of small community of Kabugwason, still a portion of barangay Ipil, lying midway between my and Toto's places. I have ample relatives in the area and so is Toto. I attended the public dance that night wearing white t-shirt, blue baggy maong shortpants, and a trendy rubber sandals, which to my astonishment was almost the same attire he wore. Perfect match in terms of colors but not in brands. We were perfect match!

It has become an exclusive night for the two of us. We stayed at one dark corner of the fenced dance floor, just talking and chuckling at each others punchlines. He walked me home that following dawn and upon saying goodbye he granted me a sweet kiss with a kind of spark I experienced for the first time. It was my first true kiss from a prince charming. I can't help but reminisce it until now.

Our relationship lasted for several years; nine years in my counting, notwithstanding the intermittent shutdowns we encountered. Well, of course, due to my promiscuity, I had several illicit affairs during the nine years we have had. Especially so that we always were far apart. He went to college in Magpayang, Mainit - another municipality southbound of Surigao del Norte province - when I worked in the city. Then he worked at one rural bank after graduation, assigned in Dapa, one municipality in Siargao Island when I worked as the Accountant in our home municipality. He stopped working and joined his father to tend their huge ricefarm, when I landed a job in Manila from year 2003. So I have plenty of space to mess around.

But he never failed connecting with me. We however encountered a bump and a hump once when his parents knew about our relationship. They stopped him from relating further with me, warning he might become gay as well. The common notion of barrio folks about straight men sexually related to gays like me is that they will turn gay in the long run. His avoidance of me lasted for more than a year. He showed up later and dared introducing me to his parents. We somehow managed the long-distance relationship for few years until we reached the point that we found it exhausting, boring and useless. I lost interest in him as I toiled in Manila's working environment and ventured into more gays' carnal activities in the metro.

One not really serious relationship, though it lasted for years was, with Marjun Murillon. He was a young public crush, both girls and gays across ages. I took notice of him when he was yet at his sixth grade harassed by gays in the neighborhood. I called him up and told him to tell those gays that we were boyfriends; that we were exclusively dating. True enough, upon knowledge of my linkage to him, the gays backed off since then. We were not actually into sexual relationship until he reached his fourth year in high school. Many girls and gays were still craving to take a bite of him but were denied because of my name (Forgive me for this conceit). When we finally decided to have sex, it was in the Anao-aon beach under one open cottage, the heavy rain poured and soaked us while we wet each other with saliva and sweats.

My other strange relationship was with Tata Diaz. He was one of my male neighbors. He was then at his late 20s, single, I mean no girlfriend. Tata approached me leaning on the concrete bridge fence, 50 meters from my parents' house while catching the fresh 6pm breeze. I used to do this at the same spot every dusk. He caught me off guard with his indecent proposal --- the kind of proposition no gay can turn down --- a sex as often as we could on the condition that I can help him gain strong and lengthy erection. It never occurred to me then that it was such a weird idea that he somehow has erectile dysfunction. So much so that he's too young to acquire such disorder. I was in fact surprised that he has this short and little penis. I tried sucking it night after night, well maybe not that often, until it indeed grew. Then we proceeded to anal sex to test the stength of his dick during penetration. I dont mind buttfucking with him because the pain with this kind of size and length was bearable. And indeed it helped. He is now happily married to Neneng Seraspe, another neighbor, and graced with 3 kids.

I also remember having this love affair with a freshman from SurStaCT, Lourd Anthony Ongayo. He was from Binan, Laguna. He has thick lips and I love kissing it. I have another Tagalog crush during my stay in Manila when I had my review for CPA board exam. His name was Benjo Clenista. He was such a delicious prey but I held my cravings because I might fail the exam for such karmic activity. During my first few years of working and living in Metro Manila, I have been involved in so many sexual activities with Manila guys, both straights and homos, aging from 17 through 40s. I really lost count of how many men I bed with, especially those times that I traveled around the Philippine archipelago. Because I always ensure that I have somebody in my hotel bed with me.

Until I fell truly, deeply, madly in love with a waray, Mr. Roderick R. Mendiola, who is definitely my last number... and the counting has stopped since.

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